Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Hypocritical Scum-Nuts Checklist

Let's see..
(But I'm sure he would oppose his girlfriend's abortion if their contraception failed--the same contraception he would deny to his fellow citizens.)

(I know I feel all tingly to look at this sex machine.)

At least he's owning up (after being caught) for his failings, right?

In the poisonous environment of Washington, D.C., any personal failing is seized upon, often twisted, for political gain. I am resigning rather than to put my family through that painful, drawn-out process.

Or not. I guess his head-spinning hypocrisy is really the fault of the "poisonous environment of Washington." My bad.

Congratulations, Mark "Republican Stalwart" Souder. Now you can join your buddies (for your 15 seconds of shame before your big-money friends find a cushy, six-figure executive job for you). High-fives all around! Some of the most recent and high-profile inductees to the Republican Scumbag Honor Roll include:

Roy Ashburn
Mike Duvall
Paul Stanley
Mark Sanford
John Ensign
Larry "wide stance" Craig
Richard Curtis
David Vitter
Mark Foley
Jim Gibbons
Ted Haggard
Randy Ankeny
Jim Bakker
Bob Barr

And there are plenty more waiting in the wings.

Jesus. How long will it take before we stop taking this political philosophy at its word? Just as surely as the priest who attempts to deny the strongest urge the human animal possesses will find that urge manifested in abnormal ways, we must realize that the sexual morality propagated by the christian right is untenable and contradictory to how we are wired.

If we would fix our behavior we must at least begin by recognizing our urges.


Malaise Inc said...

Don't forget George Rekers.

wunelle said...

Ah, yes. I'd forgotten about that Olympic-class hypochristian.

Alas, I had to draw the line somewhere; I'm already infamous for looooooooong posts, and to be inclusive with this list would make a record-breaker.

Anonymous said...

I see Jim Bakker on your list and thought he was reformed after he got out of the slammer. Now I see him marketing the xZubi device on his show. Unfortunately, the FDA has never been able to keep up with the volume of snake-oil salesmen in this country. One cell phone shield company was supposedly shut down by the FDA, and their website "add to cart" button is de-activated, but you can still call them and order one if you are still dumb enough! Maybe this product can keep Jimmy out of jail and rolling in the dough at the same time!

wunelle said...

Max Blumenthal's book Republican Gomorrah details all the get-rich-quick quackery and miracle cures these guys peddle (whether for followers or the cash or votes that come with them).

Alas, I'm inclined to look with some skepticism at any "cure" for the condition!